I Love It When Old People Talk Trash

So, I'm sitting in a restaurant recently and the table directly across from me is populated by three senior citizens. They've been there for a while and are enjoying a leisurely breakfast and some conversation together.

A couple in the far corner of the restaurant has finished their meal. They get up, pay for the meal, leave the restaurant, and walk out into the parking lot.

The old people at the table across from me immediately go into gossip mode. They talk trash about this couple for five minutes straight, only pausing to take another bite of eggs or bacon. Nothing is off limits - clothes, accessories, car. Every small detail of their lives is critiqued and criticized by these seniors.

Now, I love it when old people talk trash. For starters it's just funny. You find yourself pondering the same question I pondered as I observed this particular exchange. The question goes something like, "Really, let me get this straight, you're going to talk trash about this couple because of the way they look and what they drive? Did you look in the mirror this morning? Your pants are tucked into the mismatched socks that you put on before heading out in your orthopedic shoes to drive your '76 Cadillac to the local restaurant, but you feel good enough about your appearance to talk trash about these two?" Second, you realize that they don't mean any harm by it, it's just a way to socialize with one another, and they've probably earned the right to be politically incorrect because of their years.

What do we learn when old people talk trash? We learn that it's actually pretty refreshing to accept the comedy and political incorrectness that only the old seem to be able to get away with. If only we could all be a little bit off our rockers...